Books

These are some of the Top-Rated books for those struggling with codependency. Some I have read and others I have not but will be in the near future and reviewing on my site. All have great reviews and have helped many people who struggle with the various issues of codependency.

I will add to this list as times goes on. If you have suggestions, please let me know.


Books


Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself

The healing touchstone of millions, this modern classic by one of America’s best-loved and most inspirational authors holds the key to understanding codependency and to unlocking its stultifying hold on your life.

Is someone else’s problem your problem? If, like so many others, you’ve lost sight of your own life in the drama of tending to someone else’s, you may be codependent–and you may find yourself in this book–Codependent No More.The healing touchstone of millions, this modern classic by one of America’s best-loved and most inspirational authors holds the key to understanding codependency and to unlocking its stultifying hold on your life.With instructive life stories, personal reflections, exercises, and self-tests, Codependent No More is a simple, straightforward, readable map of the perplexing world of codependency–charting the path to freedom and a lifetime of healing, hope, and happiness.Melody Beattie is the author of Beyond Codependency, The Language of Letting Go, Stop Being Mean to Yourself, The Codependent No More Workbook and Playing It by Heart.

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Beyond Codependency: And Getting Better All the Time

In simple, straightforward terms, Beattie takes you into the territory beyond codependency, into the realm of recovery and relapse, family-of-origin work and relationships, surrender and spirituality.

You’re learning to let go, to live your life free of the grip of someone else’s problems. And yet you find you’ve just started on the long journey of recovery. Let Melody Beattie, author of the classic Codependent No More, help you along your way. A guided tour past the pitfalls of recovery, Beyond Codependency is dedicated to those struggling to master the art of self-care. It is a book about what to do once the pain has stopped and you’ve begun to suspect that you have a life to live. It is about what happens next.In simple, straightforward terms, Beattie takes you into the territory beyond codependency, into the realm of recovery and relapse, family-of-origin work and relationships, surrender and spirituality. With personal stories, hard-won insights, and activities, her book teaches the lessons of dealing with shame, growing in self-esteem, overcoming deprivation, and getting past fatal attractions long enough to find relationships that work.

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The New Codependency: Help and Guidance for Today’s Generation

In Codependent No More, Melody Beattie introduced the world to the term codependency. Now a modern classic, this book established Beattie as a pioneer in self-help literature and endeared her to millions of readers who longed for healthier relationships. Twenty-five years later concepts such as self-care and setting boundaries have become entrenched in mainstream culture. Now Beattie has written a followup volume, The New Codependency, which clears up misconceptions about codependency, identifies how codependent behavior has changed, and provides a new generation with a road map to wellness.

The question remains: What is and what is not codependency? Beattie here reminds us that much of codependency is normal behavior. It’s about crossing lines. There are times we do too much, care too much, feel too little, or overly engage. Feeling resentment after giving is not the same as heartfelt generosity. Narcissism and self-love, enabling and nurturing, and controlling and setting boundaries are not interchangeable terms. In The New Codependency, Beattie explores these differences, effectively invoking her own inspiring story and those of others, to empower us to step out of the victim role forever. Codependency, she shows, is not an illness but rather a series of behaviors that once broken down and analyzed can be successfully combated.

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Breaking Free of the Co-dependency Trap

This bestselling book, now in a revised edition, radically challenges the prevailing medical definition of co-dependency as a permanent, progressive, and incurable addiction. Rather, the authors identify it as the result of developmental traumas that interfered with the infant-parent bonding relationship during the first year of life.

Drawing on decades of clinical experience, Barry and Janae Weinhold correlate the developmental causes of co-dependency with relationship problems later in life, such as establishing and maintaining boundaries, clinging and dependent behaviors, people pleasing, and difficulty achieving success in the world. Then they focus on healing co-dependency, providing compelling case histories and practical activities to help readers heal early trauma and transform themselves and their primary relationships.

Breaking Free of the Co-dependency Trap presents a groundbreaking developmental road map to guide readers away from their co-dependent behaviors and toward a life of wholeness and fulfillment.

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Love Is a Choice: The Definitive Book on Letting Go of Unhealthy Relationships

Best-selling doctors, Hemfelt, Minirth, and Meier, walk you through their ten proven stages to recovery from codependency that results from external circumstances. Humans are susceptible to codependency because of our sinful tendency to use defense mechanisms to fool ourselves. In codependent relationships, deceitful games are played, and important Christian principles are often taken out of context and abused. God wants us to have healthy relationships with a balance between being dependent and independent. The doctors describe how the most effective means of overcoming codependent relationships is to establish or deepen a relationship with Christ Himself. They describe the causes of codependency, pointing out the factors that perpetuate it, and lead readers through their ten stages of recovery.

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Healing the Shame that Binds You

In an emotionally revealing way John Bradshaw shows us how toxic shame is the core problem in our compulsions, co-dependencies, addictions and the drive to super-achieve. The result is a breakdown in the family system and our inability to go forward with our lives. We are bound by our shame.

Drawing from his 22 years of experience as a counselor, Bradshaw offers us the techniques to heal this shame. Using affirmations, visualizations, “inner voice” and “feeling” work plus guided meditations and other useful healing techniques, he realeases the shame that binds us to the past.

This important book breaks new ground in the core issues of societal and personal breakdown, offering techniques of recovery vital to all of us.

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Boundaries Updated and Expanded Edition: When to Say Yes, How to Say No To Take Control of Your Life

To regain control of your life, you’ve never needed Boundaries more than you do today in today’s always-on, always-connected digital world. Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend wrote the New York Times bestselling book on Boundaries – the personal property lines that define who you are and who you are not, and influence all areas of your life – physically, emotionally, spiritually. And now, over 2 million changed lives later, Cloud & Townsend have updated and expanded this bestseller with essential guidance for setting Boundaries in today’s digital age.

If you’ve ever wondered: Can I set limits and still be a loving person? How do I answer someone who wants my time, love, energy, or money? Why do I feel guilty when I consider setting boundaries? Unpacking the 10 laws of boundaries, Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend give you biblically based answers to these and other tough questions, and show you how to set healthy boundaries with your spouse, children, friends, coworkers, and even with yourself.

In Boundaries, Drs. Cloud and Townsend show you how to bring new health to your relationships. You’ll discover firsthand how to reclaim your freedom to walk as the loving, giving, fulfilled individual God created you to be.

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Women Who Love Too Much

This is the world-renowned, inspiring, practical program for women who believe that being in love means being in pain. A multi-million-copy bestseller, Women Who Love Too Much presents a clear, comprehensive, 10-point recovery plan for women who are addicted to the wrong men for the wrong reasons. Among the vital lessons you will learn in this program are:

* How the search for the love you never got from your parents can become a crushing obsession in adulthood.
* How to change from loving someone so much it hurts, to loving yourself enough to stop the pain.
* How to free yourself from destructive loving and build a healthy, meaningful relationship.

This step-by-step self-awareness program offers help, understanding and, above all, hope—the pathway to making love the truly happy event it is supposed to be.

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Facing Codependence: What It Is, Where It Comes from, How It Sabotages Our Lives

Pia Mellody creates a framework for identifying codependent thinking, emotions and behaviour and provides an effective approach to recovery. Mellody sets forth five primary adult symptoms of this crippling condition, then traces their origin to emotional, spiritual, intellectual, physical and sexual abuses that occur in childhood. Central to Mellody’s approach is the concept that the codependent adult’s injured inner child needs healing. Recovery from codependence, therefore, involves clearing up the toxic emotions left over from these painful childhood experiences.

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Codependency – “Loves Me, Loves Me Not”: Learn How To Cultivate Healthy Relationships, Overcome Relationship Jealousy, Stop Controlling Others and Be Codependent No More

If you’ve had difficulty with starting or maintaining relationships, issues with feeling jealous and possessive or find that your connections with others are more a source of distress than anything else, this book is for you.

It may feel sometimes that an intense and serious connection with someone is proof of the depth of the feeling you have for one another. But be careful, obsession and dependency is not the same as love.

In the codependent relationship, our affection and attention is coming from a place of fear and need. As a result, the partners never really connect with each other. They do endless, complicated dances around each others problems, but what they never do is make an honest human connection.

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Workbooks

Boundaries Workbook: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life

The New York Times bestselling book Boundaries has helped millions understand that being a loving Christian does not mean never saying no. This newly updated and expanded companion workbook provides practical exercises for setting boundaries in marriage, parenting, business, and friendships in a digital age.

Following the newly updated and expanded edition of Boundaries chapter-by-chapter, this interactive workbook helps you look at specific relationships in your own life. With those situations in mind, you can ask and answer:

  • Why do I feel guilty about setting clear boundaries?
  • What if the boundaries I set hurt the other person?
  • Is it difficult for me to hear no from others?
  • What are examples of legitimate boundaries at work and home?
  • How can I have good boundaries online?
  • How can I stay connected while still setting boundaries with my phone?
  • In what ways do I need to set better boundaries with social media?

Boundaries Workbook gives a biblical foundation and practical tools for helping others respect your boundaries—whether you are not responding to a text message immediately or saying no when someone asks you to volunteer for one more activity.

Discover firsthand how good boundaries give you the freedom to live as the loving, generous, fulfilled person God created you to be.

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Codependent No More Workbook: Exercises for Learning to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself

This highly anticipated workbook will help readers put the principles from Melody Beattie’s international best seller Codependent No More into action in their own lives.

This highly anticipated workbook will help readers put the principles from Melody Beattie’s international best seller Codependent No More into action in their own lives.The Codependent No More Workbook was designed for Beattie fans spanning the generations, as well as for those who may not yet even understand the meaning and impact of their codependency. In this accessible and engaging workbook, Beattie uses her trademark down-to-earth style to offer readers a Twelve Step, interactive program to stop obsessing about others by developing the insight, strength, and resilience to start taking care of themselves.Through hands-on guided journaling, exercises, and self-tests, readers will learn to integrate the time-tested concepts outlined in Codependent No More into their daily lives by setting and enforcing healthy limits developing a support system through healthy relationships with others and a higher power experiencing genuine love and forgiveness letting go and detaching from others’ harmful behaviors. Whether fixated on a loved one with depression, an addiction, an eating disorder, or other self-destructive behaviors, or someone who makes unhealthy decisions, this book offers the practical means to plot a comprehensive, personalized path to hope, healing, and the freedom to be your own best self.

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Journals

My Journey to Discovering Me: A Journal for Codependents

Journaling is an amazing way to process and release all the negative feelings and emotions, we as codependents seem to hang on to, to justify (whether consciously or unconsciously) our unhealthy behaviors. It also helps us to process situations we are currently going through in a healthy and positive way. There is power and freedom in releasing those negative feelings and emotions on paper. My hope is that as you begin to journal, you will begin to experience that power and freedom.

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Journaling Joy: 101 Journal Writing Prompts for When You’re Stuck (Journaling with Grace)

Journaling has many proven benefits, from mental and emotional health to physical well-being. But sometimes, self-exploration is not the easiest task to tackle. You might open your journal and stare at the blank pages, not knowing what to write. It might seem as if there is too much, or nothing at all, to write about.

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The Language of Letting Go Journal: A Meditation Book and Journal for Daily Reflection

This journal, a companion to the popular meditation book of the same name, offers exercises for daily reflection, affirmation, and change in helping people let go of self-destructive thoughts.

Fear, shame, anger, self-doubt. Helping people “let go” of self-destructive thoughts, emotions, and behaviors has been the life work of acclaimed author Melody Beattie. For more than a decade, millions of readers have turned to Beattie’s classic meditation book, The Language of Letting Go, as a wellspring for daily reflection, affirmation, and change. Now the journal edition, using abridged text from the original best-seller, allows readers to record their thoughts, fears, and accomplishments. Key features and benefits: Beattie’s work is known and trusted among self-help readers. Journal format invites readers to personalize meditations.Meditation themes explore common relationship issues. A thoughtful gift for friends or a great gift for yourself.

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Adult Coloring Journal: Co-Dependents Anonymous

Clinical Therapist, Courtney Wegner has carefully selected the illustrations and 12 Steps prompts in this interactive adult coloring journal for their meditative power to enhance the recovery of anyone engaged in a 12 Step program and to aid in their journey of self-discovery and an addiction free path to happiness. The 12 Step prompts contained here are an excellent tool and aid for anyone taking the 12 Steps. Features include:

– 80 lightly-lined writing pages provide plenty room to capture your thoughts
– 40 expression pages for jotting down personal reflections, quotes, poems or sketches
– 40 professionally illustrated adult coloring images of varying difficulty
– High quality 70# paper

Each topic is available in different coloring image themes and a wide array of beautiful covers.

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